Psychologist Response:
Roz Kalb, PhD
Senior Programs Consultant, Can Do MS
Thank you for the great question! Let’s talk about first things first. Why are other people finishing your sentences for you? Are you slower to respond than you used to be? Do they seem to be impatient with you? I don’t know whether you’ve tried explaining your cognitive issues to others, but it’s important for them to understand why it takes you longer to formulate your thoughts and put them into words. I would recommend giving them basic information about processing speed and the way that MS can cause it to slow. You can share the National MS Society’s free brochure with them – Managing Cognitive Problems in MS. Being slower doesn’t mean that you don’t have good information and valuable opinions to share. It’s fine for you to ask people to be patient and give you time to respond on your own. When they fill in the gaps, they are assuming they know what you want to say – and they may be totally incorrect!
Regaining confidence in your own opinions is also a priority. Do you have a close friend or family member with whom you could practice putting full thoughts together and then get constructive feedback? Practicing with someone else, or even by yourself, will be very helpful. Think about what you want to say, organize your thoughts say it aloud from start to finish, and then evaluate what you said. Does it make sense to you? Is it what you were thinking and wanted to say? Practice is the only way you’re going to regain the confidence to finish your thoughts.
I would strongly encourage you to consult with a speech/language pathologist. SLPs specialize in helping people with the kinds of difficulties you’re experiencing. An SLP will give personalized and specific tips on how to manage both your difficulty with completing your thoughts and your impulsivity. These issues are common in MS and an SLP with experience in MS will do a complete evaluation and recommend a management plan for you. If you have difficulty finding an SLP in your area, call a National MS Society MS Navigator® and ask for a referral. Since the pandemic, consultations of this kind are also being done virtually, so if you don’t have an SLP in your area, you may be able to do the work remotely.